Six Myths of the Proverbs 31 Woman

By: Dr. Jenn Murff

I have NEVER liked reading about the Proverbs 31 woman. This prestigious super mompreneur seemed to have tackled the business world with ease, conquered the home front in excellence, given back to the community in love, AND still had time to look like a rock star. She was the lady who kept her home looking like a picture from Better Homes and Garden magazine, sewed her own curtains, sprouted her own grains and then had time to volunteer at the local homeless shelter. In other words, she seems so perfect; it left women like myself feeling as if we could never measure up.

What can we learn from this woman who rose with the roosters to have breakfast on the table with her make-up done and her hair fixed, and lunch in the oven all before seven a.m.? She is everything a mom entrepreneur and leader longs and strives to be but fails to achieve every time. Who is this woman and how did she do it all?

Myth 1: She traded her dreams for motherhood.

There is a misconception that when a woman starts having children that they have to put their dreams in the trash. The Proverbs 31 woman did the contrary. She was an entrepreneur that followed her passions, walked in her purpose and the reward naturally followed. She understood that the driver of success lied within those three simple words; passion, purpose and reward. If just one of these three elements is missing, then success is impossible for an aspiring entrepreneurial leader. Passion and purpose is the prerequisite when starting a business or ministry. Passion is what gets an entrepreneur or leader up in the morning and keeps them up at night. Purpose is the fuel that keeps their dream alive and pushes them in the daily grind. Unfortunately, passion and purpose minus reward equals a fun hobby. Combining your passion and purpose into a rewarding business or ministry lends to fulfillment and success as an entrepreneurial woman.

Myth 2: Her sole Influence was only in her Home.

The Proverbs 31 woman completely debunked this myth. She was not only known at the gate but was passionate about making a difference in her community by giving back. The Proverbs 31 woman is a great example of a social entrepreneurial leader who not only met the needs of the consumer but also had a passion to meet the needs of the underprivileged. Mothers are born to be social entrepreneurial leaders. God designed us to see a need and meet the need! Whether it is through charity, ministry or social enterprise, women are up for the challenge to helping others in need.

Myth 3: She Lived Only for Others

It is so easy for a mom to focus all of her energy and resources on everyone around her but neglect herself. Lets make no mistake, the Proverbs 31 woman made an investment in herself. She clothed herself in fine linens and purple, pursued her passions and ran after her dreams without sacrificing her family but most importantly she delighted herself in the Lord. Her security and strength was found in God alone and this became her legacy.

Myth 4: She had no support in her pursuits. 

One of the most powerful pictures that we have of the Proverbs 31 woman is the picture that is portrayed of her loving relationship with her husband. In fact, the most important relationship that a wife has outside of her relationship with God is with her husband. Marriage is the outward expression of our inward love for God. In marriage, a husband serves as a protector by helping us draw the line on when rest is needed and boundaries are crossed as well as help discern when the heart is weary and gives confirmation when dreams are conceived.

Myth 5: She did it all alone.

I have read Proverbs 31 countless times but have I failed to notice verse 15, “She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her Maidens-Servants”. Wouldn’t you know that this prestigious super mompreneur had someone else clean her house, someone else sew her curtains and someone else sprout her grains while she volunteered at the local homeless shelter. It would seem that what we viewed as our picture of perfection was obtained through art of delegation. This makes tackling the business world with ease, conquering the home front in excellence, giving back to the community in love and still having time to look like a beauty queen attainable.

Myth 6: She had it all together.

There is an invisible standard that women try to obtain; it is called perfection. Often times, we compare ourselves, dilute our gifts and covet seasons by embracing the infamous compulsive comparing disorder. We tend to forget that the life of Proverbs 31 woman and other “successful” mothers is a picture of their entire life span rather than something that was obtained at 25 years of age. The Proverbs 31 woman did not seek perfection only excellence. We cannot fall prey to the infamous compulsive comparing disorder that seems to paralyze women by keeping them from walking in their passions, purposes, and promises that God has set before them.

Now that we have debunked these myths about the Proverbs 31 Woman, you can officially stop comparing yourselves to others, follow your passions, walk in your purpose and be the mom, wife and leader that God created you to be.